Two Truths And A Lie: The Presentation

Everyone knows this game. It's on the list of silly icebreakers that you're forced to participate in when it's your first team meeting at a brand new job or you've just moved into your dorm and the whole floor decides to get together and go ice skating in Central Park where you clutch the hand rail for dear life the entire time and look like Bambi when he walks onto that frozen lake (oddly specific). I've decided to amp it up a bit so that my followers/readers/subscribers/whatever the fuck you guys are called can get to know me on a more intimate level. And what better way to do that than by lying to all of you? So, without further ado, can you guess which of the following facts about me, my family, and my life are true and which are false? The winner gets nothing!

1. I shoved a crayon so far up my nose that I had to go to the hospital to get it removed.

2. My father sneaked (I always thought the past tense of "sneak" was "snuck" but spell check is telling me NOPE) backstage at Woodstock.

3. I was born in Brooklyn, 

New York.

4. I have never had the chicken pox or the chicken pox vaccine.

5. My aunt and uncle used to own an ostrich farm.

6. I can speak four languages, including English, French, Spanish, and Russian.

 

7. I used to weigh about 200 pounds.

8. My dad drummed for a Billboard Top 100, Number 2 song.

9. I hate all bugs and immediately kill them when I find them in my apartment/personal space.

10. I am half Chinese, a quarter Native American, and a quarter English.

11. I have a scar on my upper thigh from riding my bike too slowly.

12. My mom is a blonde republican.










So those are the fact (or are they?). Make your guesses now because tomorrow I will be revealing which of these are truths and which are lies. If you know me personally and I have told you one of these things (Sam, Aparna) or you are one of the people I'm talking about (hi, mom!), then keep your trap shut and don't ruin my life.